complicated made simple :)

things has been really well lately. first of all, BIRTHDAYS! we just celebrated 3 peepoos's bday during this 2 weeks, one my roomate, next my friend, then last my roommies's friend. today alone we bashed 2 bdays at once, of course not as fun as what we did back at home, but who cares. by the way, the cakes here are just oh-so-delicious! ohhemmgeee! xD and so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY shoutouts to ahkaw, dhanraj and maribelle!

over bdays now, back to reality. just finished 3 exams, and lucikly i passed! wheeeee~ :D although i didnt really passed with flying colours, but i passed, so YAHOO! especially recently, i just had my very first anatomy exam, and it was oral exam + mcq questions. i effed the mcq, but the oral rocks! anyway i PASSED! hahahaha :D

winter break is just around the corner, and some people over here are going back to malaysia. they damn syok lor.. damn envy laaa~ :( the only time i know that im going back is next year, july! goshhhh T.T

just so u know, the only time for me to cure my home-sickness and missing-u-bastards-back-at-home-ness is here, yups blogging helps. the whole point of me blogging is to let U guys out there know whats rolling in muh life now. so when i know that ur actually reading whats for u intentionally, that means the world to me. although i will not know that ur reading, as long im still alive, this blog will.

first of all, guys :

kc,ck,kk,ysj,cwh,tjh,kxj,shah

next, gals :

yv,ww,xn,xl,gxy,hjw,wsm,pc

i miss u guys EVERY moment im here

only now, i know

how important your existence is,

to my life

i heart y'll..

-stillatstake-

futured diary

20th December 2012

Today, the mayan calender came to an end

so as everything else,

when the world came down upon us,

i remembered, holding your hands, real tight,

your breath against my face,

those forever-ly sweet lips,

your skin, your body, so warm

remember those times when those who called us 'an object'?

we were, and we are still

even till now, at this very last moment of everything,

before the world engulf us,

i just want you to know,

i love you..

-stillatstake-

usual routined

as the days goes by, im kinda numb to the fact that i have to at least travel 10 miles and endless hours wasted on just transportations. if this were to happen to me back at home, i will definitely *nodding head really hard* complaint non-stop. but right now, what the hell...

officially, this is my second week here in my university, third weeks to be exact that i have called russia my second home. things hasnt been going as smooth as the perfect plan that WAS supposed to be planned out for us, but we are just teenagers, so eff it. actually there has a lot of stuff going on right now during my stay here, had really happy moments and some down moments too, what?! im human too, i have emotions..

so, classes were boring as usual, some were interesting though i have to say. like today, i had biology class, and we did this microscope experiment and speciments and stuff, and we have to draw what we see through the lens, sounds boring but it was actually the first time that i enjoyed class in russia. so yayyyy! :D

the one thing that i like about studying in my uni is, or can i say being a med student in a med school, there are some really, i mean REALLY important stuff that u have to obey, like first, everytime, no screw that.. EVERYTIME when we have classes or lessons or lectures, we HAVE to wear our lab coats, if not, classes at the corridor. personally, i dont mind having corridor sessions, but its freaking winter now and if we stand out at the cold for even just 5 mintues, my balls will be shaking out of control, literally. ohya, forgot to mention, the corridors are not heated, only classrooms are, so pick a choice, corridor or future doctors lookalikes? :)

i am so blessed to be an afs student, i mean serioooooouuuussssly! without those afs moments i dont think i can even survive here. sometimes, when im trying my ass off to communicate with the locals, one or two italians might occasionally slip out of my tougue and people will as usual give the 'what?' look. ooppss :p

well, i have anatomy exam this thursday and as usual, NOT PREPARED! HAHA :D!

anatomy : bones, muscles, human body, organs, tissues, dicks, cells, brain cell, nervous systems,

whatever, i just hope i wont become one of them after exam,

so chaozzzzz :)

sometimes,

i think,

what would i be,

if all these,

were back home...

-still at stake-

merah segi empat a.k.a red squareee! xD

OMG, today was just another day that spells pure A.W.E.S.O.M.E.N.E.S.S! although the earlier part of the day wasnt really as awesome as i had my first anatomy class in my lifeeeeeee :D it was fresh, new and an experience. anyway it was definitely memorable, but im going to have class EVERY thursday in red squareeee! weeeeeeee :DDDD!!

being at one of the most iconic places in moscow definitely brought me back to afs italy, i felt like an exchange student all over again.. ahhhhhhh~ it was enjoying, how i wish my whole time here till now was just another exchange, just without the host family, free meals, comfy homes, and a hell lot of time spend on studies.. -________-

well thats all for now, i still have exam next week, anatomy AGAIN! -.- goshhhhhh, who ever invented this subject definitely is not a sociable person, because i have to spend like 3 whole fucking days to just memorise one whole human skull, lame right? haihhhhhhhh.. well nobody said that doing medic is an easy task..

thanks guys for today,

i really appreciate it,

and most importantly,

i got to relieve that again..

spasiva~ :)

-still at stake-

for being here..

and so, russia has became my second home for the next 6 years, yes YEARS! having leisure time travelling in russia is already not easy, moreover about studying here.. well... i chose this path, embracing it well should be on my to-do list by now..

so far, as usual, its NOT a smooth sailing. ups and downs are definite musts in russia, according to the people who stays here. but lucikly its not for long before i got into the normal university student life that im in now. its hectic i have to say, no more enjoying and taking my own sweet time as i was like when im in high school. university is a totally different world, u go to classes or not the lecturers dont even give a shit, they will just move on, only some lecturers are kind enough to take attendance. and in my uni, travelling is an everyday torture, let me break this down for u, every single day, except for holidays and sundays, we have to travel for a minimum of 2 hours to our classes, with the help of 2 buses and 6 metros in total, to and from. for the first few days were seriously a pain-in-the-ass, but as time goes by, its just another day in university...

talking about russian people, one word : extraordinary. especially for some old russian folks, i think that they dun know how to actually communicate with foreigners, and since russia was a communist country, they think that every non-russian are bad people. during my first day in russia, no screw that, my first moment landing in russia, when i was still pushing my trolley full with my luggages strolling in the russian airport waiting for my transportation, i accidently, accidently, hit a russian old lady in the calf, because my trolley was REALLY heavy and difficult to control.. she actually turned around, looked at me for a moment, figured out that im non-russian, and started fucking me in russian, when she was done, she turned around and stormed off. i was like stoned, my shoes were as if they pasted to the floor with elephant glue, and i still remember thinking : '' so thats how they say welcome to russia in russian...' lol -___-

in the end, i have to depend on myself on everything. having a bunch good buddies here definitely helped me a lot, and i appreciate very very VERY much for their help for everything. without u guys, i will be like a duck finding his way out in a chicken coop..

university grows people up. its a pathway that leads everyone to adulthood, and i have to admit, stepping into adulthood SUCKS! although i enjoy maturity and what we CAN do now, sometimes, i really wish that there is a time macchine that can bring us back to the childish times,
where things are so much, SO MUCH more simpler..

well, there goes my life now, chaoz!

im here, and ur there,

i really miss u, for what i care,

at past, the time we meet is rare,

to me, its so so unfair,

sometimes, i feel like im gasping for air,

the scent of your hair,

the clothes that u wear,

its all still so vividly, in my mind,

i just want to let u know, that u were mine,

were, past, time,

all i wish, is that you are fine,

thank you, for you gave me, the time of my life..

-still at stake-

counting down the moments...

again, with the come back of everything. this time, i really, REALLY REALLY hope it will be the last time that i have to do this. your's truly here is going to Russia to do medicine in a few days time.

my whole 2009 was a HUGE mess, or should i say, errmmmm... blessing in disguised maybe?it all started at last year december, went to another, and my last exchange to Italy. had one of my MOST EPICLY awesome time over there and came back at feb 2009. right after i reached malaysia, parents started talking to me abt my college, university, future, bla bla bla.... then it all happened..

college for 6 months, everything, EVERYTHING was planned out soooo smoothly and nicely that it was almost impossible (and it was). plan was : start college for 6 months, then take indonesian entrance exam, pass it and move on to uni in indon. WOAH! i still remember vividly, during that time, i whole head was fulll with omgs and wows...

ok plan started off really well, college was definitely memorable and FUN. took entrance exam, passed it and started celebrating. went to the uni in bandung, then all of a sudden, POOOF!

''i am sorry liyu zin eu, but u cant continue ur studies in Universitas Padjadjaran. its our policy to NOT allow colour blind students to study in here, im sorry...''

ok nevermind, i still have a back up. USU, in medan. so went back malaysia for a week, then off to medan. studied there for 1 month and half, another drama awaiting.. ''im sorry liyu zin eu, but u cant study in USU anymore due to ur colour blindness'' ''but i thought this university doesnt have the rules or policy saying that u dont accept students like me?'' '' for ur information, we JUST set the rules early this august after the 1st batch of first years came in, u came in at september, so i the rules are inforced now. im sorry...''

alright then, if He up there doesnt want me to study in indonesia, then fine. but please, PLEASE, do not let me go through this kind of drama again, i've had enough ups and downs, and its almost reaching my limits...

no more drama in russia, no more....

*keeping my fingers crossed*

i know that im strong

physically and mentally

but i just hope

JUST hope

that i have more strength

to take charge of my life

to control my own destiny

fucked up

i dunno where to start, everything is sooo messed up in my mind now. but, one thing is for sure, i do miss home a lot, i mean seriously, i REEEEEAALLLYY miss home A LOT! i have never been soo damn homesick before.. ;( sometimes, i do feel like i dont belong here. everything here, everyone here, is not for me. i have been here for nearly a month now, and at some nights, i really feel like that i have made the wrong decision coming here. i even feel regret for being here, since im here, everything in me seems to fall apart. im actually trying hard to be the person that i used to be last time, my character, the liyu zin eu that he used to be, sometimes, i dun even recognise myself... and now, typing my heart out, in the middle of the night, how pathetic! i really need someone to talk to, someone that can relate to my situation, not just anybody... to all my dear peeps who are reading this (u know who u are), i just want u to know that i miss u guys EVERY SECOND. not just an ordinary 'i miss you', but sincerely from my heart, i really do miss u all. i missed everything u guys did together, i missed all the fun that i was supposed to be in. that feels like a stab in my stomach with a freaking knife. it hurts... badly.. and to that special someone who gave me the portrait of us, i love u so much for doing that and really appreciate what u did, thats like my medicine when im diagnosed with freaking-miss-you-guys syndrome. LOL ;D anyway, what the hell. im telling u, the only fucking reason im staying here is because of my dream, and if this shit place doesnt deliver that to me, im gonna freaking burn this university down man.. alright, thats everything that i need to say, feeling much better now... ;) p/s : i've never been blogging since like forever.. ;p -mission accomplised- [Lee YOu]