it was suppose to be inside, not here..

i have a lot of things running through my mind now, good things, bad things.. haihhh.. how i wish i can just throw all the stress away for just one time and live life to the very fullest. i think a lot of people in this world would wanna do that.

i know this space is for me to express my everyday feelings and emotions so that everything wont get clotted inside and one day, it will eventually explode and that would be the worst case scenario. but, sometimes, somethings and meant to be kept inside, in the deepest part...

everyone has some follies that do not wish to be known by others, it would be too embarassing. im definately not excluded, everyone should have their own secrets that only they know about it. shhhh~ =)

well back to reality, im now here, in my dorm, exploring my mind and typing out my heart. my parents are coming to visit me today, guess what, in BANDUNG! :D hehe.. as usual i dun really have any homesickness, just like usual, like all the previous 3 exchanges. well i had fun yesterday and later so i think its time for some self-exploring and some tranquil self-time...

off for some dream making... tatazzz

[LI - U]

Banduuuuuung...

life here ROCKS! indonesia might be less cilvilised than malaysia, but the people here are wayyyyy more friendly and helpful. i think, throughout the whole jatinangor area, my campus is the cleanest in the area of the city -______-

omg did i mention about the fooooooood here. emmm emmm emmmmmm~ sooooo niceeeee~ omg~ and one more good reason for me to grow fat here, the foood is darn c.h.e.a.p! damn im going to grow sooooo phat.. T.T

yet still, i miss u sooo much. ur presence still lingers around me.. haunts me like the air around me.. send me dreams to make me miss u even more...

'the moment u left, i start to flood, with waves of memories, suffocating me, and at the same time, provides me the air that i breath. u make me my world my spin, without u, i dunno what will i be....'

[LI -U ]

this is it...

this is it, all the hard work, all the time wasted, all the energy used, are all used for this single moment. and still, i cant believe that all of this is happening...

a year ago, i was a SPM student. as like all other normal form 5 students, we struglled for just one thing --> SPM. then time passed by, tick tock tick tock... a year has gone, everything is done. and hooray! how happy we are. yes, indeed, at that very moment, everything in this world seemed to be stopped, at that exciting moment. no more pressure, no more studies, no more anything, just kick back and relax, that was all in our mind...

only till now, i realised that my mum was right all the time. 'eu, enjoy ur school life, its the best time u can ever have, appreciate every bit of it.' this is what she always use to say. and i will always, always think :'' nah, not at all, school life is boring, damn lots to study, how good is it to be to work and be involved at the outside world...'' and the daydreaming kicks-off. how naive...

growing up is not easy, maturing is even tougher. there are more to think, more to analyse, and more to be wary of. although my pre-u (college) life is short, its valuable. i grew up there, my mind was hammered with tonnes of new things every single day like nails, and it stays, as a reminder...

now im here, spending my last few moments here, tomorrow off to indon for 5 and half years. thats pretty long huh. well, all i can say is,

make sure i dun make another girl pregnant. LOL :D

[LI -U ]

emo-tion

please God, let the anchor down for time, its moving way tooooo fast.

13 days left for me, for me to enjoy life, for me to spend some quality time, for me to clear my mind and prepare myself for the next phase in my life, for me to redeem myself.....

i always thought to myself, its just like another exchange programme, but unfortunately, the truth its not. after stepping onto that plane, its gonna be a long long while when the next time im taking that another plane back. the thought of it just makes my stomach upside down.

how do u expect me to face all these with a smile?

[ Li-U ]