loned . never before . never again

friday. normally this day is the most anticipated day of the week because weekend is just around the corner. *duhhh* people will rush to bus stations to get their tickets back to their hometowns or would go to friend's house to have sleep-overs or something. but for me, this particular friday, 5th June 2009 was a abnormally normal day for me. i'll tell u the reasons.

i have 5 room mates staying with me in my condo. jaye went back yesterday evening, and today 3 went back, that leaves me and one of my room mate. but then, he's going to leave by tmr. and that leaves only me and this empty condo.

as usual, woke up late in the morning as i do not have class today, LAN class in the afternoon was cancelled. after lunch i went to college to meet up with christine for some tough asshole math questions. then i came back home. when i reached my doorstep, normally i would take off my shoes and go straight to my room to unload my jeans which by the way is always the four pockets is always occupied with 2 handphones, my wallet and my condo keys. and the house would be filled with chattering noise.

but today when i stepped in, a sudden 'burst' of silence just hit me right in the face. suddenly i stopped, looked around the familiar scene which has been with me for the past 4 months. but yet today, everything seemed to be so un-affable and distant from me. no noise, no commotion, no people, no nothing. emptyness.

the noise of silence is really disturbing, annoying and irritating. its like an invisible alarm that keeps u awake and constantly reminding u that ur alone. i looked around my room, glanced at every little detail that room can offer. i have never, i mean NEVER paid serious attention to my room before and i found out that my room is actually kinda big and spacious. all these while, with the constant filling of people at my room makes it appeared to be smaller and always compacted. optical illusion perhaps.

i walked around, checking through my neat and tidy (ya right~) closet, tidied it up, did some laundry, dried my washed clothings, cleaned up the study table and kitchen table a bit. and didnt did know, time passes really fast when ur hands are busy with chores.

it was almost 6pm when im done with all the chores, watched knowing and eagle eye, two really awesome movies! went to buy dinner and ate while watching the movies. it might be very normal day to most, but to me, today i actually thought of something that i didnt ever thought before. i might be alone someday, where all my friends have left to Russia to do medic and im to Indo instead. like now, all my friends have went back to their hometowns and im stuck here because my parents ditch me to go honeymoon to China. the feeling of being alone is seriously phucked up. the feeling of emptyness and loneliness has haunted me today but i have learned to coped with it.

now, im blogging on my tidied study table all alone in the empty living room. normally during this while, the air would be filled with laughter and chit-chats and kak efa (my college janitor, she's staying with us) would come out of her room with her hair all messed up, shouting at us to shut the fuck up! haha xD! but, now, nothing...

thats all from me today, going to bed soon, good night. zzzz

yours truly,
[ Lee You ]